I'm glad the pandas are safe.

I woke up this morning to an email from my dad, asking if I had heard about the news in China. I hadn't yet, but somehow I knew right away that there had been an earthquake. I don't know how I knew; it was just the first thing that came to mind. I quickly went to the BBC news website. A quick skim through the article told me all I needed to know - huge earthquake, at least 12,000 dead, massive rescue efforts currently underway. I cried this morning when I read that. It was a very quick cry, because I had to get ready for work. It didn't escape me though, that right now, I am one of the luckier ones in the world. But I guess news of tragedies like this are reminders that luck can change at any time.

A glance at the map - I had been to one of the affected cities during my trip last year. Chengdu, the capital of the province. I went there to see the pandas (which were adorable, I really am glad they're safe), and remember regretting that I couldn't stay longer, because Chengdu was actually a pretty neat city. It is odd to think of what's going on there right now. Chengdu wasn't hit as hard as some other cities though, with only 900 dead.

Only 900 dead?!?! I can't believe I actually thought that when I read the numbers this morning. 900 people is a lot! I can barely even wrap my brain around a number like 15,000 - the updated death toll, at least in terms of 15,000 lost lives. Every single one of those people who died leaves behind any number of loved ones, devastated. Not to mention the fact that many of those very same people have also lost houses as well. I can only begin to imagine what it is like to have to rebuild your life after a tragedy like that. The sheer number of people who will be doing exactly that simply overwhelms me emotionally.

Of course, I'm also thinking about what is happening in Burma. A large part of the reason I was so affected by the news of the earthquake in China was because I am still grappling with the scope of the tragedy in Burma.

34, 273. Wrap your mind around that number. That's the current death toll in Burma. 27, 838 people are still missing. And now for the big one - 1.5 million people who survived are still waiting to be helped while their government continues to play games with the international aid community. A million is a number so large I can hardly imagine it. To think of the more than 1.5 million people in Burma and China, right now, who survived only to face disease, starvation, being trapped under rubble, mourning the loss of a loved one, or seeing their entire village destroyed - are they really the lucky ones?

One of the things that hit me the hardest was a description of an elementary school in China, attended by about 900 students. The building had collapsed in the earthquake, with most of the children inside. While the parents either joined the rescue efforts, or waited anxiously for news of their own child, a "mourning tent" was set up for those who had already received the bad news. Bear in mind that with China's "one-child" policy, most of these families lost their only son or daughter. I suddenly had this flash in my mind, that I was a parent walking into the mourning tent, joining the others already enveloped in grief. Just for that split second, I was able to put myself in the shoes of one of those parents. It was a very powerful moment for me. I could barely imagine the suffering of only one person without losing it. Another reminder of how lucky I have been in my life so far.

Over 1.5 million people. And that is only in China and Burma. Never mind the rest of the world.

I have an idea - how about we invent a machine that turns human grief into energy? Talk about an endless source!

Another reason the news of these two tragedies has hit me so hard is because of my recent trip to Hiroshima. I've been reading eye-witness accounts from A-Bomb survivors (I know, uplifting!), detailed descriptions of what it is like to be around after a huge disaster. So it is all very real to me right now. Usually, when I read about tragedies in various places, I feel sympathy for the people affected, but it always seems so far removed to me. I feel a surface-level sadness. But right now I am feeling it at a much deeper level. I think my time in India, meeting people who survived the Tsunami face to face, also has made it very real for me.

I'm harboring a fantasy that instead of going back home after Japan, I will join the volunteer efforts in Burma. I don't know if my help would be accepted though, given that plenty of help is currently waiting on the borders. But there are other places. Sometimes I wish I had become a medic instead of a teacher, because when I read about disasters like these, I want to be a part of the relief efforts.

So I said I would share info regarding agencies to donate to. In the end, I came to the conclusion that the International Red Cross was the best bet, given that they are already on the ground in Burma. Their website is www.icrc.org. Please consider making a donation!

Forgive me for this heavy themed post. I had to get the thoughts out.